There’s a Website for That


>>[INDISTINCT CHATTER]>>BLOW HIM AWAY, BLOW HIM AWAY, GO, GO, GO. [PHONE BEEPING] OH, THAT’S MY ALARM TO GO TO BEST BUY AND PICK UP WAR HERO THREE FOR MY WAR HERO.>>SWEET. HEY, CAN YOU MAKE SURE TO GET THE GOLD EDITION?>>UH, NO, ‘CAUSE I’M GOING TO GET THE PLATINUM EDITION.>>THAT’S A BALLER MOVE, BABE.>>AND DON’T WORRY ABOUT DINNER ‘CAUSE I’M MAKING KOBE BEEF BURGERS!>>I LOVE MY LIFE!>>UM, QUESTION FOR YOU…>>YEAH.>>WHERE DID YOU MEET THAT GIRL?>>ONLINE. YEAH, I SIGNED UP FOR MEETGAMERBABES.COM.>>BUT WHY DOES SHE LIKE YOU?>>BECAUSE SHE ONLY DATES GAMERS AND THEY HAVE SET THE BAR VERY LOW.>>THE INTERNET’S CRAZY, MAN.>>I KNOW. AND IT’S NOT JUST FOR DATING, MAN. EVERYONE I ASSOCIATE WITH I CAN CHOOSE ONLINE. EVEN MY NEIGHBOR, FRANK.>>WHO SAID MY NAME?>>WHADDUP, FRANK?>>Y’ALL WANT TO COME CHECK OUT MY NEW BOMB SHELTER? I STOCKED IT WITH BEEF JERKY, DEER JERKY, AND IF YOU’RE FEELING PATRIOTIC, LIBERAL JERKY.>>OKAY, WHERE DID YOU FIND THIS GUY?>>NUTCASENEIGHBORS.COM.>>WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO LIVE NEXT DOOR TO HIM?>>BECAUSE COMPARED TO HIM, I’M THE PERFECT TENANT. MY LANDLORD DOESN’T EVEN MAKE ME PAY RENT ANYMORE.>>I’M GOING TO SIPHON SOME GAS FROM SOME TERRORISTS. TRUMP 2020!>>OKAY, DUDE. I DON’T LIKE THIS. I MEAN, WHERE IS THIS GOING TO END?>>OH HEY, SON. DID YOU NEED SOME SPENDING CASH?>>OKAY, THAT GUY IS DEFINITELY NOT YOUR DAD.>>THEPARENTSYOU’VE- ALWAYSWANTED.COM.>>WELL, OKAY. WE JUST CAME BY TO DROP OFF THE LAUNDRY YOU MAILED US.>>HOPE YOU DON’T MIND BUT I IRONED YOUR BOXER BRIEFS, MADE YOUR BED, AND LEFT A MINT ON YOUR PILLOW. HOW ARE THINGS GOING WITH MALLORY?>>HON, COME ON.>>OH, I’M SORRY. IT’S NONE OF OUR BUSINESS. WE’RE JUST HERE TO FINANCIALLY SUPPORT AND CLEAN.>>BYE, SON.>>HOW DESPERATE TO RAISE A MAN-CHILD ARE THEY?>>THEY’RE JUSTIN BIEBER’S PARENTS.>>OKAY. SAY NO MORE, BUT I STILL FEEL LIKE THIS ISN’T RIGHT.>>JEREMY, IT’S 2016, MAN. THIS IS HOW PEOPLE MEET PEOPLE. YOU MIGHT AS WELL EMBRACE IT, DUDE.>>[SCOFFS] THERE’S NO WAY I’M GOING TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY FABRICATED ONLINE RELATIONSHIPS.>>JEREMY, HOW DO YOU THINK WE MET?>>AT THE PARK. YOU HIT MY CAR WITH A FRISBEE. IT WAS COMPLETELY RANDOM.>>WAS IT?>>WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?>>MEETMUSTACHEDHALFASIAN- FRIENDSNAMEDJEREMY.COM.>>NO… THAT’S NOT TRUE!>>IT’S TRUE.>>THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!>>THAT’S FINE. THERE’S, LIKE, FOUR MORE OF YOU TO CHOOSE FROM ON THIS SITE. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING THAT VIDEO. SUBSCRIBE AND I WILL PERSONALLY SEND YOU A LINK: NUTCASENEIGHBORS.COM.>>YEAH.>>THERE WE GO. WHADDUP, BRO?>>COME GET A TASTE.>>GO TO THEIR HOUSE, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?>>WE’RE JUST GOING TO GO CRAZY, MAN.

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100 thoughts on “There’s a Website for That

  1. No that’s not true, that’s impossible.

    That’s what Luke says after finding out Darth Vader is his father

  2. EVEN MY NEIGBOR FRANK, WAT UP FRANK WANNA GO IN MY BOB SHELTER WE HAVE BEEF JECKER IFNENE EHF FIVJDHDHEBBD F FHFBDHDBDR CBE DB DWOW I ANM DNGANRHTOMB YXYKTO TRULO TOENYY TENTYH. SON SPENIDNG CASH. THE PARENTS YOU E ALWAYS WANGED. CON

  3. Liberal Jerky and Trump 2020? You know, I can't in any way condone canibalism, but other than that I can get on board with this….

  4. Fun Fact: I have a neighbor named Bob. He’s like 70 something and when he mows his backyard, he sings opera

  5. "And if you're feeling patriotic

    LIBERAL JERKY" Lord have mercy that is the best. Shots have been fired–and it is so clear that Studio C holds no political influence.

  6. "There's like four more of you to choose from"
    I can't tell if that's a bad Asian joke about there being a lot of them or you rarely see an asian with a moustache (it's rare for me)

  7. The real reason that his landlord doesn't make him pay rent any more is because he met them online too!

  8. Oh my goi two people are playing with turned off controllers and one has a ps3 controller and the other has a PS4 controller

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